Dienstag, 27. September 2016

The future is to be present

Hey guys,

as some of you might know already out of the social media platforms, I finally made it to Lisbon to do an erasmus semester on physical education there. The five week long road-trip to get here was a wonderful adventure with so many beautiful moments and experiences of all kind. We shared what was around, smiled and simply enjoyed life together. The people changed from time to time, but the vibe stayed the same.

I randomly found a book called "the complete idiot's guide to Buddhism" in my van at the beginning of our trip and this book startet to become one of my best companions. One of the many important things Buddhism thought me so far is, to not think of us as separated individuals anymore, but of something bigger, something that is way more connected than we can even imagine. 
The other day we were having dinner in a side street in front of an illegal vegetarian “restaurant” (you get a cheap meal there but you have to wash your dishes by yourself aswell) and we somehow came up with the metaphor of us (humans, animals, plants...) being something like a hairbrush and each of us is one little bristle. If somebody brushes his hair the bristles bend in the same direction and some also break from time to time, most important: all the bristles are linked. Even more the saying “every action causes a reaction” makes sense now and it strengthens my belief in THAT bigger plan the universe got for all of us. Be good to the world and all it’s inhabitants and you shall receive the same kind of treatment.

As I often catch myself being kind of worried about what the future might bring, these thoughts are giving me a lot of hold at the moment. Almost everybody has these feelings from time to time I guess, but we shouldn’t. The only way how we can actually change our life for the better is to be deeply present and enjoying the moment anyways. Step by step! We wont reach our goals by always worrying about the future and what we will do in ten years, we can just live as happy as we can be and be the best possible version of ourselves day by day.
Personally I have to admit that sometimes staying positive is not the easiest thing to do, I KNOW! We (and I count myself in for sure) make everything always look so easy and smooth on all the social media, but sometimes it’s hard to continually see the bright side of life. But happiness is, and I always have to tell myself that fact on and on again, NOT something that happens to you, but something you decide to be.

So... I can surf again, most days at least and I’m super grateful for that opportunity. If you would have told my doctors half a year back that I will surf this summer, they would have just laughed and walked away. But it’s fucking happening.
But still, my foot is far from good, some days I have troubles walking and to deal with a lot of pain. Another big limiting factor is my head and I guess all my body functions. It seems like I need way more time to recover from exercise and so on. Sometimes I have a lot of pressure on my head and then I can’t really hear on my left ear. I guess that’s a stress reaction or something like that. So right now I’m far from being fit, but I do my best to stay positive and believe in my abilities. And that's all I can do right now. There is always a decision between just being happy with what you have and the situation you are in and on the other side complaining and either thinking about the past or the future. The thing is, that neither nostalgia nor all worries about the future will help you to improve the situation you are in.

The reason why I thought about writing about this topic is, that of course a lot of people ask me what I do and what my life is all about and I have troubles finding an answer to this question. Often I get asked if I will ski again, but that question just has no value for me right now. I can’t ski NOW, and NOW is what I want to deal with and spend my time with! Sometimes it feels like I lost what I tried to build up over the past five years, but that’s not true. It’s just one stop on this big journey and it’s a hell of a ride. My accident fore sure broke up all the structures and plans that I had set up so far, but that only means that I have a lot more space to build new things now. I like to compare it with a cup of coffee which was quite full before something emptied most of it and now there is a lot of space for some fresh coffee.

Here is a little phone video from my first day back on a surfboard. The wave was small and my style is, NOSTYLE, haha. But it was one of the best moments since a while, as you can see at the end of the video :)


Writing in this blog from time to time sharing my feelings and thoughts is a big help for me to process what happened and I hope some of you also can get something positive out of it, that’s the one and only reason why I will keep on hammering in my keyboard.

Love you all,


Mittwoch, 24. August 2016

music is life

As some of you maybe noticed already I spent quite some time playing reggae and dancehall music together with the mad Innfaya sound/dj’s the past couple of months. Music was always a big part of my life, mainly because it connects people and transports a lot of emotions. Especially after I started playing bass in my first band eight years back, I began to realize what music means to me.  No matter if on a stage or just singing out lout alone in my car while driving, it always accompanies me.
“one good thing about music, when it hits you you feel no pain”

So it was kind of a natural evolution that I started to play music on some parties. At the beginning mostly on events in the ski scene, because as a Skier myself I already had a lot of connections. Then, at ISPO 2016 I asked a friend from Innsbruck, Josh (Innfaya Sound) if he wants to join me in Munich and DJ at the ISPO after party. He was in straight away and we had a really good time playing music together.

The following week I had my accident in France.

Two and a half months later I was able to leave the hospital and move back to Innsbruck. I was still in pretty bad shape and in a wheelchair, but I felt pretty strong again and my flat mates said they would help me with my daily tasks and so my dream of moving back to Innsbruck finally became reality. Thanks buddies!!
After one week I started to walk on crutches again, but I was still pretty weak and my arms could barely carry my weight. Nevertheless, this could not stop me from having a good time and Josh was hosting a reggae party in the aftershave a few days later. He asked me how I feel and if I want to join. “fuck yeah” haha
So around midnight that day, we left Josh’s flat and I strapped the crutches on my bike. I could already kind of ride a bike, because I just needed the tip of my feet and it did not really hurt my broken heel. But of course crashing was not an option, also because my shoulder/collarbone surgery. Oh man, haha, that was pretty skatchy…
When the first people entered the aftershave I spotted some of my best buddies from Innsbruck. Oh man, after being away for so long, just seeing these people again made me so fucking happy. I just played twenty to thirty minutes, mainly because I was not really able to stand and my head started to spin after a while, but for me it felt like heaven. I’m back at it! Slowly but surly!
After that Josh and Spragga (our MC) played a sick set and when they dedicated the song: “solid as rock – by Vershon” (listen!!) to me, I almost had tears in my eyes. Thanks so much guys for making all this possible.

Josh, Spragga and me 

So I stayed in that club till 2:30am with crutches and only one shoe, because my other foot was still too fucked up to wear shoes. This was not a real problem until I wanted to bike home and it started to rain heavily and the temperatures dropped rapidly. I got soaking wet and I was freezing, but the rain couldn’t vanish that big smile of my face.
The most important aspect of that music thing is, that it showed me how many different paths I can still walk on, even if it turns out that my body won't allow me to ski anymore.
Back then it gave me strength and helped me believe in myself and my abilities. There is always a way, we just have to continue working hard towards our goals and have a good time.
I for sure want to get back on my skis, but finding this passion for playing music again and putting a lot of energy into it feels pretty damn good right now.

Special THANK YOU to the Innfaya Crew for all the support and your friendship: Manfred, Reiner, Josh, Spragga, Sebastian, Linda (Miss Weirdy), also Dani and Michi for making the ISPO show happen and all the others who supported me along the way!

The past two-three weeks I travelled together with Josh and friends through Czech Republic and the SMS-festival in eastern Germany to do some shows there. What a great time, good vibes only! After that we went straight to Benicasim (near Valencia) to spend a few days at Europeans biggest reggae festival – the “Rototom Sunsplash”. We didn’t have a show there, but we brought speakers and dj equipment, so we for sure hosted some wild camping shows.  

Right now we are in Galicia and I'm about to surf my first waves since my accident. So excited, 

Love music 


Mittwoch, 1. Juni 2016


Boom, I just felt like it's time to relaunch this blog.
And yeah, it's a relaunch indeed, you might almost call it a rebirth. 

Why? Here is a quick summary of what happened.
So, its been four month now, since I almost killed myself in a terrible ski accident in Les Arces, France. After falling down some cliffs I ended up with a traumatic brain injury, a punctured lunge, several broken ribs, broken heel, broken collar bone...  Well, the most dangerous thing was my brain and therefore they had to put me in an induced coma to keep me alive. At first they planned to wake me up again soon, but my lunge injury caused some blooding and an infection, so they had to keep me in coma until it gets better. I finally woke up three weeks later, they said it was really lucky, I could have stayed in this coma for a few weeks/ months more...

I didn't ask to much questions about what happened, resuming this now, I guess I was not capable of understanding at that point. During coma a dreamed crazy shit, that I drove home again, partied, got arrested at a party (I guess caused by one of the episodes I had during they had to hold me down in a wake up process that went wrong so I won't rip out all the needles and shit)
So, waking up was super weird.  I didn't know where I was and why I was there. I could not remember a thing from the accident, I thought everything was alright, but I could barely move my hands or legs. I still didn't know what happened on this first day/night when I woke up, I guess I was still pretty high on all the drugs they pumped into my system for three weeks straight, crazy trip I tell you guys.

The first thing that seemed like reality again was, when my beautiful girlfriend Victoria stood besides me at some point and went crazy about me being awake. Everything that happened during that time period is really blurry, but I felt kind of normal and was just happy to see her. The doctors said that they tried to wake me up three times before, but it was always to dangerous and then they told my family it could take muuuch longer. But suddenly I showed vital signs by myself, which they said is pretty rare and they were able to wake me up on Victoria's last day in France before she needed to head back to the US. I truly believe that the reason I woke up was her voice and her presence. I will never be able to pay back what you did for me, Thank you!

By the way: This is how I looked three days after i woke up, you guys don't want to imagine how I looked during coma or on the first day...  and yes, those guys just shaved my head without my permission...

As I already said, it was a crazy time after waking up. Especially because I was in fucking France and I didn't know why and none of those frenchmen spoke english, haha. 
Victoria finally explained everything to me and showed me the video of the crash and then I started to realize what happened. But I was still so far from understanding what big of a deal that whole thing was for so many people, my family, my friends ..
Victoria ended up staying two more nights which was awesome, but she needed to get back to the States in order to train for olympic trials.
It was tough to say goodbye, but it was necessary. The cool thing was that I already made friends with the nurses and doctors in the intensive care station and so we just gave a shit on visiting hours and spent her last night together in my intensive care bed, which was kind of the most illegal thing you can do there :)

During the daytime the doctors and nurses always came checking on me and seemed like they couldn't believe how well I'm already and we were joking around and having fun together. At the same time I figured out a little french and there was also one doctor from Spain with whom I was able to practice some of my Spanish I learned in Central and South America last summer. Finally I realized that the nurses and docs were just super stoked that one of the patients is actually not suffering a big brain damage or ends up with a sheet over his head. I still remember the beeping from the machines there... it's not one of the good memories.

After three more days I was able to leave the Grenoble hospital and they flew me to a hospital in Salzburg, finally I was closer to my family and friends. This was a big day for me, I was really looking forward to get back to Austria and see everybody again. From the first day on a large number of people came to visit, which was super nice and gave me a lot of strength to fight through this and stay positive. 

I was also able to use my phone again and started to realize what happened during I was gone. I saw personal videos, an uncountable number of emails, postcards, facebook messages... Seeing all this helped so much to come back to a normal life, I felt so loved and I'm so grateful for all you guys and all your thoughts. All my sponsors, even the CEO's emailed me, people from around the world, I think this huge amount of love saved me and encouraged me to come back even faster.


Still, it was an unbelievable hard time for me. All the messages and visits for sure helped so much, but this weeks have been the toughest I've ever had. At some point I got super depressed, just wanted to get out of hospital and live a normal life again, walk wherever I want to be, but it just seemed so impossible. I feel super emotional right now when I think about that period and I'm happy I pushed through it. Now I can look back and say that the whole experience made me so much stronger and taught me to appreciate life even more. I'm happy to be alive and more than ready for new adventures.That whole thing is not over at all yet, I still need a lot of therapy and my body needs to recover, but I regained most of my energy and I don't feel like a victim anymore.

This was maybe the biggest step for me, to realize that searching excuses for why I can't do this and that is just the easiest way to live life. But as soon as you decide that you are not a victim anymore a new life starts. With way more strength and greater than you could have ever imagined.

Turbulent times result in growth!

Thank you family, friends, sponsors, doctors and nurses and all you guys who read this, I love you all

Mittwoch, 14. Oktober 2015

Donnerstag, 6. August 2015

One day in Nicaragua.

Yesterday I had quite an adventure. 
I'm in Nica since two weeks now and I'm enjoying this really remote areas on the Pacific Coast a lot. It’s just a lot different from what I experienced in Bali last summer, or at any other spot I've been so far. 
After starting our trip in San Juan Del Sur, which is basically a party village for boozing and coke sniffing Americans, I was happy to enter a different world in Playa Gigante. We found a place called Monkey Hostel, which is built on a big cliff with an awesome view over the ocean. There was not a lot going on there, but we hung out with the owner (which turned out to be one of the best big wave surfers from Nica - Oliver Soliz - check him out) and his cousins and pretty much lived the local life there. Surfing and chilling in the hammocks. Tranquillo!

this girl used to hang out with us during the day
Anyway, we decided it's time to move and the place we wanna check out is Popoyo, which is famous for its fantastic waves. We decided to save 40$ for a cab and started a pretty funny hitchhiking mission. Soon we got picked up by some local pig sellsmen who drove their fucked up car around trying to sell their pigs. They finally dropped us in the middle of nowhere. The second vehicle I tried to stop then was a big black truck and this Canadian guy immediately stopped and gave us a ride. It turned out that he's just building a hotel in an area called Magnific Rock, close to Popoyo. (The name will be Cafe con Leche - check it out - it will be open in a few weeks and this guy is a really cool character)
want some pigs?

We finally arrived in the hostel in which we are staying right now, called Popoyo Beach Hostel. The owner, Frederico, is one of the kindest and nicest guys I've met on this trip so far. I asked him where I can get some money because there is no ATM anywhere around Popoyo and how I can get there. And this brings me to the actual story I want to tell:
Jeffrey, one of Frederico’s friends, offered to lend me his (pretty fucked up) motorbike so I could drive to the next ATM, which was about 15km direction south on a sandy and rocky road. I  was in adventure mode and so I didn’t think a lot about the lack of gas in the motorbike or that I’m just wearing my snapback cap and a boardshort. At least sunglasses would have been a good idea, because every truck passing me caused a sandstorm behind him and I was kind of blind. It turned out that a few cordobas (local currency) would have been helpful too.  Haha

So I started the journey and I realized that the ATM was further away than I thought and that I could run out of gas any time. I luckily found a guy selling gas and after I was able to explain to him (in Spanish) that I don’t have a single cordoba with me but that I really need some gas to get to the cajero Automatico (ATM) He filled a liter or two in my ride and agreed that I should come back later when I have some money so I could pay him.
After ten more minutes I arrived at this big white building in the middle of nowhere and found an A/C cooled room with an ATM inside. YESS!!! OR NO!! Kind of a bummer when both my debit card and credit card, didn’t work. The debit could was just not readable maybe because I had it in my phone case which had a magnet inside. And the credit card, I don’t know... So I had to take a decision. Should I go to the next bigger village and search for an ATM there or should I head back. Would the gas be enough to get to Tola (twenty more min on the motorbike) or even back to Popoyo? I didn’t really think it through but I headed Tola.
I was really happy when I finally saw the village from the distance, but just in that moment the motorbike ran out of gas and I had to roll it into town. The Locals enjoyed this whole situation but they have been really helpful too. Two guys accompanied me to the ATM and it turned out that this ATM doesn’t accept my cards either. FUCK, FUCK, FUCK NO MONEY, NO GAS AND nearly an hour away from my place. And no tourists or anybody around who could get me out of this mess.
So I was hanging out there for a bit till a lady who was watching me all the time told me there is another ATM a bit further down the road and that I should try this one. Luckily my Spanish was already good enough to understand what she was explaining to me.  I finally arrived at this ATM (from a different bank company) And when I finally heard the cash sorting sound I was super happy. I’m safe now. 

this lady helped me out with some gas :)
Got some cash, and found some gas and headed home.
It was already getting dark and my motorbike had no real light in the front so the ride was pretty dangerous but I managed to get back in one piece and even gave a local guy a ride for about 8km which he normally walks everyday.
I told Frederico and Jeffrey what happened and they listened and got really amused. HAHA, that’s a “normal” day in